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Bearman’s 4th Annual Cartoon Charity Challenge
The 2012 Bearman Cartoon Charity Challenge!
It is time for Bearman’s Cartoon Charity Challenge! For the past four years one of the best cartoonists I’ve ever enjoyed has been donating money to local Cincinnati charities. Bearman did the caricature of me that you see as my Gravatar!
All of the rules are located in the links below.
Bearman in not only a fine artist but an amazing humanitarian. Add him to your blogroll, post a link to Bearman’s amazing blog, Facebook or Google+ site.
Go to Bearman’s site and check this out. You’ll be amazed at how much he raises out of his personal funds. It costs you nothing and you’ll be helping many people in need.
The Following is from Bearman’s Charity Page
As in previous years, the first $500 raised will once again go to the Cincinnati FreeStore Foodbank. This charity does great things not only to feed those in need but also to help families get back on their feet in other ways. Anything donated above $500 to the max $1000 will go to support the Down Syndrome Association of Greater Cincinnati. I have a relative with Down Syndrome and this organization does an incredible job working with the families of those afflicted.
But that is not all. Some of you know I donate 100% of my commissions directly to Crayons to Computers. It is a free store for teachers allowing them to stock up on school and art supplies for their students/classrooms. So I am going to match dollar for dollar anything you donate to Crayons to Computers up to a max $500. When donating just make it in Honor of Bearman Cartoons and they will know how to notify me.
Check it out, enjoy Bearman and his sense of humor, art, cartooning skills and most of all Help Out. All for free and you’ll also be a better person for it!
~Miss R
Gone for Three Days: New Ben Folds
Ten of my favorite artists in the world . Together.
Ben Folds is my favorite paramount piano player composer. Liberally mix Billy Joel, Elton, Randy Newman, classical, stride, and completely original darkly humorous and/or serious music and lyrics.
Add British contemporary writer; Bruce Hornby . The author of High Fidelity , About A Boy, Fever Pitch, and many other wonderful novels and short stories.
The video posted below features a song with all lyrics by Hornby and all music by Folds.
Ordered the new Ben Folds album. Amanda Palmer (Dresden Dolls), Bruce Hornby, William Shatner (hysterical), Pomplamoose, Sydney Orchestra, Squirrel Nut Zippers , name a new indie and he’s there, NEW Ben Folds Five… Ben rocks. Several of the tracks were written during the time period that Folds and Hornby were working on Ben’s previous release ‘Picture Window’ but were not included on the album.
A CD is finally available of not only ‘best of’ Folds, new Ben Folds Five, Hornby and Fold’s collaborations but live performances and rarities. Feel free to order. I did.
The Best Imitation of Myself: A Retrospective Perceptive.
Here’s a video -which has could have been posted previously on YoYo-Dyne-. As usual with Youtube you may need to let this load to see it in full..sans the damned buffering shiat.
~Miss R
All of the Good Ones Are Taken… one for the road
Gotta love this classic. Don’t know it? Hey you kids get off of my lawn..
BLOGOCIDE!
Yep you read it here first.
Everything is gone for the last 3 weeks. Deleted. With such pain.
Yeppers. Even the PCH chances with Zombie Ed McMahon. You know I’m serious about cleaning out inbox stress when the retirement plan goes out the window. You think I’m kidding? Ha.
Show Me The Money Zombie Bitch
Tony is taking time off for a screenplay (know it’s about all of us –looks about furtively-). EG is skydiving naked on a bar (whoa! Big-ass parachute), Don is in litigation with some asshat who posted an open pic, Bearman is cartooning all of us, Michelle and Michelle are kicking asses and taking names; politically and personally. Red is chasing them down and nailing their asses to the literal floor, Hotspur is fucking with his outside and inside life, Androgoth is being his wicked-ass self.
Rants has been deployed to Afghanistan.. again -send good thoughts!- and Loon is keeping us up to date from down under. Not to mention the fun from the Wombies in OZ… oh it goes on and I miss it. Miss you all.
Got to say though: Shenanigans. Do over.
Almost Burn time for Miss R, and busy is the new sloth.
See you all soon!
~Miss R
Hallelujah
First of all apologies to all of the wonderful writers out there, that I have not commented on recently. Hell, am not even capable to comment on the YoYo-Dydne Posts. Back up to 500 in the Inbox unopened.
If you’ve been following for a while I’ve been known to drop off the face of the earth for a week or so at a time. Still alive and kicking though.
The disease keeps me from leaving the house, interacting , answering the phone, working like a damned normal person and keeping the fear away.
So, despite the SSD diagnosis, and Mensa membership (genius and insanity remember?) my musical compass has always been right on.
Love Leonard Cohen. Also know that there are better covers of Leonard’s songs than his original Hallelujah .
Here is Damien Rice. One of my favorite musicians, and his rendition of this beautiful song.
And I apologize once again if I have not gotten to your post.
Be Well.
~Miss R
It’s Money that I love… nothing to see here..no. really
Randy Newman is one of my musical heroes. Too many people associate his music with ‘Short People’, which he didn’t want to be released as a single.
Here’s the twisted Newman.. that I love
S
Cartoon Insomnia du jour… or du nuit
Worked for me
Murder! Mayhem! Sex! Free Beer!
I am so full of crap. Great headline though eh?
This is my “I am Bored and All Alone in Reno Birthday Survey”.
Please do steal and re-work it for your own glee and amusement.
I did.
Tired of all of those surveys made up by dumb and/or degenerate
high school kids?
How about one made up by a dumb and/or degenerate adult?
50 questions for the people who are a tad older
1. What bill do you hate paying the most?
Car insurance. Those blood suckers
2. Where was the last place you had a romantic dinner?
Um….. it’s been months and months. Probably TK’s house.
3. Do you regret losing your virginity to who you lost it to?
Who says I’m not a virgin? Sheesh. Lies and whispers I tell ‘ya.
4. If you could go back and change one thing what would it be?
Marrying Lucky Ex-husband Number Two. That dickhead.
Bitter, party of one? Your table is ready.
5. Name of your first grade teacher?
Abraham Lincoln
6. What do you really want to be doing right now?
Sitting on a beach in the sun reading a book while simultaneously being felt up by a hot erotic man. Oh yeah, since this is fantasy I’m drinking a glass of champagne as well.
7. What did you want to be when you were growing up?
A pathologist or a movie star
8. How many colleges did you attend?
Two; graduated from the second. could n longer afford the first.
9. Why did you choose the shirt that you have on right now?
What shirt?
10. What are your thoughts on gas prices?
Oh they’re too low. I must pay more.
11. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you where would it be?
Somewhere warm with the ocean nearby… South America maybe
I2. First thought when the alarm went off this morning?
Thank god that was a dream –shudder-. Nightmares are my life.
13. Last thought before going to sleep last night?
It’s cold in here and who stole my life?
14. Favorite underwear?
none
15. Favorite thing about the opposite sex?
eyes
16. What errand/chore do you despise?
cleaning up after other people i.e. my kid
17. If you didn’t have to work, would you volunteer?
Sure. For CIA pharmacological experiments.
18. Get up early or sleep in?
Well that depends if I actually sleep at all
19. What is your favorite cartoon character?
George Bush
20. Favorite thing to do at night with a guy /girl?
That is potentially the stupidest question I’ve ever come across. Pardon the terminology.
21. Have you found real love yet?
I did but of course I’m an idiot romantic
22. When did you first start feeling old?
In the early 90′s when I realized that my vinyl collection far outnumbered my CD collection
24. Your favorite lunch meat?
Unbaptized small child. Medium rare.
25. What do you get every time you go into Costco?
An empty wallet
26. Beach or lake?
Beach.
27. Do you think marriage is an outdated ritual?
No. I just have a steep learning curve
28. Do you own property?
Technically my daughter is chattel and not property
29. Favorite movie you wouldn’t want anyone to find out about?
Oh yeah I’m gonna post that.
31. What’s your drink?
Club Soda and Bitters. Shaken not stirred.
32. Cowboys or Indians?
Huh? What happened to ‘grown-up survey?’
33. Cops or Robbers?
I always played the Serial Killer. Strangely there is no one around to confirm this
34. Who from high school would you like to run in to?
Hank Stratton. He was my best friend, which brings me to a favorite joke:
Why did god invent fat girls? So little gay boys would have friends.
35. What radio station is your car radio tuned to right now?
KRZQ or NPR. Don’t remember.
36. Norm or Cliff?
Norm. Cliff was not amusing just dumb. The same reason I’ve always detested I Love Lucy.
37. Grey’s or The Office?
Neither. Dexter or 60 Seconds to Disaster
38. Worst relationship mistake that you wish you could take back?
That should read mistakes plural, this is not an essay and I am not Dostoevsky
39. Do you like the person that sits directly across from you at work?
You mean the cat?
40. What famous person would you like to have dinner with?
Dead? Dorothy Parker. Living? Harlan Ellison.
41. Indoors or Outdoors?
For what –raises eyebrows- ?
42. Have you ever crashed your vehicle?
In 1982. Into a tree off of Laguna Canyon Highway. Driving my ’76 Camero. At 50+ MPH. Good times.
43. Have you ever had to use a fire extinguisher for its intended purpose?
Well it wasn’t really me, it was the driver in car in front of me. On the 91 freeway in the middle of the desert coming back from Palm Springs. Seems the engine was on fire. Damned disposal Hyundai
44. Last book you read?
The Lost by Daniel Mendelsohn. An account of the author’s search for family members who were killed by the Nazis in Poland. It’s funny, sad, intriguing and suspenseful.
45. Do you have a teddy bear?
Hell no.
46. Strangest place you have ever brushed your teeth?
The front yard. I don’t think that this is so strange though.
47. Somewhere in California you’ve never been and would like to go?
Camping along the Russian River
48. Do you go to church?
What is this ‘church’ you speak of?
49. At this point in your life would you rather start a new career or a new relationship?
Funny you should mention that as I have neither
50. How old are you?
19 or 39. I can’t remember…..Steely Dan or Jack Benny
Currently listening:
Small World Big Band
By: Jools Holland & His Rhythm & Blues Orchestra
Release date: 18 December, 2001
-NOTE- This was originally posted in 2007, and answers reflect that time in our/my glorious history. In particular I was 12 years sober, still had retirement accounts, and had not yet sprouted a gray hair; the Demon Seed was not yet into the full tilt boogie evil teen mode. Seems as though nothing else has changed.
Thanks to Max for re-posting this and reminding me. See her answers to my eccentric survey at the previous link.
Oh. my birthday is actually November 12. Gift registry available at any Dollar Store near you.
N is for Neurosis
Kurt -The Ultimate Neurotic.
Caricature courtesy of artist Kathryn Rathke
Listening to Joe Sample right now, after an earfest of Sinatra. I’m doing an El Guapo here. Posting this late afternoon’s musical choices that is.
Not to be confused with ‘listening similar to’ El Guapo.
EG and Tony: don’t tell Mrs. Guapo
Anyway, tertiary is my middle name. Except this post is N for Neurotic. Ergo, all theorems proved by scientific method; see paragraph above. Same results in pristine laboratory settings (the living room and office) or your kitchen.
Neurosis runs (gallops, bobsleds, careens, bucks…you get the picture) through the family. Being a lifelong over-achiever I’m appointed the poster child for the Black clan.
Go ahead and get married, have the last name of an ex-hubby, change your name legally. The Black curse is upon you all Buahahahaha. –stops for water and takes Xanax-.
Okay, back now. Here are the three main criteria for getting your familial Neurosis on:
- Nature: Are you and/or your family subject to any of the following DSM certified symptoms?
a) Eating Disorders
b) Bi-Polar
c) Eccentricity
d) Black ™ Sheep Family Syndrome
2. Nurture: Are you and/or your family involved in any of the following professions?
a) Psychology
b) Psychiatry (three thumbs up here!)
c) Waste Management Disposal (+2 if your surname ends with ‘I’ or is similar to the range below Falsetto…)
d) Addiction Specialization (social workers, AA ashtray cleaning, nursing, dealer –either here in a Nevada casino or located at the local street corner-)
3. Intelligence/Talent?
a) Off the charts Mensa 1%er IQ?
b) Savant i.e. dumb as a box of hair taped up but able to play an oboe in tune
c) Genius IQ AND musical/photographic/acting/writing/amazing artistic ability
d) Tap dancing even though Ed Sullivan is still dead
Well faithful readers how do you score? On the test. Not with the opposite (or same) sex.
Years of intensive research have led me to this simple questionnaire. Combined with years of psychiatry, therapy, analysis, medication, hospitalization, straightjackets (oh hell that was a club in San Fransisco nevermind) and obsessive reading/learning skills. Damn. Reminds me. Forgot to list OCD up there with the ‘Nature’ answers.
Conclusion: Fuck Piaget.
See Online Merriam Webster definition for Neurosis below.
Have left out the pronunciation guideline because if you are reading this you know how to pronounce it.
Neurosis: a mental and emotional disorder that affects only part of the personality, is accompanied by a less distorted perception of reality than in a psychosis, does not result in disturbance of the use of language, and is accompanied by various physical, physiological, and mental disturbances (as visceral symptoms, anxieties, or phobias)
Bah humbug. I got ‘yer solution right here. Closer to the Holmes 7% Solution than any meds on the market. Don’t ask me how I know this.
Dr. Rachee Black (I play one on TV, parties and formerly working for dad –the psychiatrist) recommends a minimum of 2 G&T’s per evening. Xanax bid or as needed. Some days none are indicated. Those are the days that begin with S; for Somnolence. Watch this Space for upcoming definitions!
*This study may be affected by pharmaceutical US costs, physician co-pay amounts and general degradation professed towards any person suffering from anything BUT admitted Neurosis. Once again, not that I’d know.
Cheers!
~Miss R
-addendum: iPod just switched to Elliot Smith; Miss Misery is the first track. Gotta love being in synchronicity with life, the universe and everything. Say isn’t Towel Day coming up?
Dial M for….. ‘M’ is for Murder
Here’s my newest hit tune to try and get your ire up. Or Irish. Or Hebe. Perhaps Eye-talian.
Mitt Romney could be a blood relative. Scary.
Before this honorarium here’s a story dealing with murder. Well you faithful readers know PF2 from previous posts. New readers? PsychoFuck2; The last ex-husband.
So anyway he’s buried in the old farmhouse in Michigan. The one I gave over to PF2 in order to escape. Now I’m forced to leave this hip home in Reno due to lack of space.
PF2 lost my house in foreclosure. I was so depressed the party at my house was broken up by the police.
Luckily for the new owners of the place in Michigan the vegetable garden has awesome soil.
Naw not the money is making me move. Everybody Lies.
Yeppers. The basement is full. Despite The Shining furnace. Could not get the damned bodies into the wood or coal burner. Tall bastards. That’s the way I like it like it like it uh huh uh huh uh huh.
Anyway the ground has been frozen solid here in Reno for 5 months. This is NOT a funeral home. No room at the Inn. Hell, I adore dating… just not most of the dates. Basement is full. Garden can’t be dug up for at least another 4 weeks.
Moving is the only option. Oh, I’m not a nutjob like the White City murderer. Just a conscientious dating and single gal. And what’s a fire poker between friends?
Anyway, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. On to More Murder
Ode to Mitt Romney
Mitt Romney Mitt Romney Mitt Romney
You‘re acting the ‘publican zombie.
Mitt Romney Mitt Romney Mitt Romney
Are you sure that you’re not the commie
Mitt Romney Mitt Romney Mitt Romney
Your wardrobe is bought via Palin
The losers behind in the polling
Get cash for the clothes from the mailman
Mitt Romney Mitt Romney Mitt Romney
Your RNC vests are so omni
Can hardly wait till you’re in the bathroom
Just tapping your foot with a zoom zoom
Mitt Romney Mitt Romney Mitt Romney
How can you stay ‘way from the Blacks and Jews
Your comments on all Anti-Mormon
Are all responses to morans.
Mitt Romney Mitt Romney Mitt Romney
Your voting is such a di’chotmy
Think self-deportation shall work
And medical care is for jerks
Mitt Romney Mitt Romney Mitt Romney
I know that you’re just fucking sorry
If murder was legal in this state
You’d be in my garden in slate
No Ted Nugent on this one. Still thinking of a video producer. Oh wait. I’m a TV producer. Hmmmm need casting suggestions. Any suggestions or volunteers?
M is for Murder. Of our country.
~Miss R
L is for Laughter…
and Les Misérables.
Laughter is something we’re unfamiliar here at YoYo-Dyne. After all, Lithium is no longer available on credit* Funny how laughter and fear go together. Am thinking that’s why they do. What’s funnier than fear? Or death? Nothing! Here’s a tidbit including Laughter, Life and Les Mis…
Damn I miss living in NYC
.
* YoYo-Dyne (and Buckaroo Banzai devotees ) will recognize that line.
K is for Kinky
What else did you expect from me? Especially since I screwed you on F.
This is a collage of pics. Some home, some from my beloved Burning Man camp, some my fave classics. Enjoy.
Oh, if it doesn’t look kinky in the photo be assured it did lead to something K after the pic was taken…..
Also… these are SFW El Guapo
Here’s a tune by a favorite band of mine to listen to while browsing. What else but The New Pornographers
One of my my fave Page photos. Own a Klaw original Polaroid of Miss Page.
Ah yes. Moi Riding in Critical Tits at Burning Man 2009
Just another minute at Spanky's Wine Bar
More Bettie. Dear god you're a Helen Keller grad if you can't find the beauty in Bettie
Another fine Spanker at 4th of Juplaya
Am sure you were all hoping for some real kink. This is a family site. Despite WP continuing to mark my site as ‘Mature.’
Honestly kids… have you ever seen me ever post anything but immature?
~Miss R
stop cispa
This was posted by my dear friend Max Adams She is founder of the the Academy of film Writing in Los Angeles, award winning screenwriter, activist, sought after lecturer and amazing, intelligent and insightful woman. She is also one of the funniest and most caring people I've ever met.
If YOU are an artist of any integrity -or a concerned citizen in regards to censorship on the Net, illegal monitoring, or government intrusion into our writing, take a look at this clip.
Max has previously posted several insightful pieces on SOPA. Check out her blog 'Celluloid Blonde.'
~Miss R
Back to the Future..and a bad joke
An old man and woman were both residents at a very nice nursing home. Each day the two would meet for lunch in the dining hall, talk about the old days, laugh, and enjoy each other’s company. After lunch, the two would stroll the grounds and eventually end up on “their bench” secluded by bushes and trees.
The old man would stroke the old woman’s hair, kiss her, etc. And, as usual, he would always suggest that she… touch his manhood. The old woman would always reply, “Oh no! I couldn’t do that. It just wouldn’t be proper!”
One day, the old woman seated herself in the dining room and waited, and waited. The old man didn’t show up. She thought was, “He must have gotten confused and went out to the bench first.” She decided to walk to their private spot.
As she approached, she saw him sitting with another woman.
The next day, she decided to confront the old geezer. While angry and hurt, she told the old man what she had seen and added, “I thought I meant something to you. I thought we were a couple. And besides, what does she have that I don’t?”
The old man simply shrugged his shoulders and replied, “Parkinson’s.”
